After watching the trailer, I see a lot of promise here, but I also think there’s a lot that can be pushed.
I think the final product could benefit from a layering of clips from this scene interspersed between clips of other scenes from the show. It would build tension and give the viewer an intriguing peek into what they can expect from Dorothy as a whole. This could also strengthen the emotional beats and psychological layering, by showing the range of emotions/performance from the actors, as well as the themes of the story. Unless you really perfected this scene as your trailer, it would be difficult to achieve successful psychological layering from just one scene.
Tension should pull back in shots where the car is driving away and focus more on the interactions/dialogue between the characters. If you wanted some wide shots for variety, I would suggest landscape scenes, or pushing the creativity of how you shoot. I think some close-up/POV shots, if done tastefully, can be really helpful in letting the actors give convincing and powerful performances, increasing tension. This could help structurally as well, as I find myself feeling sort of distant from the characters in this iteration of the trailer. Of course, we can’t hear their dialogue, and this was mostly a test, but I want to believe in the dynamic of their relationship in the final version, whether that’s trusting or uneasy or fearful.
When finalizing the dialogue for the trailer, it should feel realistic and dramatic, but not over-the-top, either. Its emotional beats and look into each character’s psyche should be subtle but powerful, mimicking real-life human interactions and dynamics. There shouldn’t be an over-explanation of exposition in the trailer either, the audience should be able to grasp what’s going on through showing rather than telling.
I think the music choice is a nice song, but I don’t know if it feels appropriate in terms of tone with what we’re seeing in some parts of the trailer. I think the final trailer would benefit from a song that is either more tonally fitting, or instrumental music that can move fluidly with the emotional beats of the scenes.
Overall, I hope some of my feedback is helpful and I look forward to seeing how this evolves. I hope to get more script content and meet with the other writers soon!
okay ilyas! i want to start off by saying that I fully agree with adding a couple of shots of the face and some honest dialogue to establish the relationship between two of our characters. I think were we start to differ is the song choice. I see where you’re coming from; and maybe we can keep our current song but use an instrumental version of it? I do want to pick your brain some more because i’m loving your input!
Agreed. To strengthen tension and psychological layering, I would recommend interspersing a few carefully selected stills throughout the trailer, e.g., crime scene details, a mugshot, an empty house, or a deserted street.
These kinds of visual inserts can function as tonal anchors, suggesting stakes and backstory without over-explaining, and helping the trailer feel more cohesive and unsettling. They’re also relatively simple to capture or source, which makes them a practical way to add production value without expanding scope.